Oliver Makes Me Laugh

I'm waiting, once again, for my laptop to turn back on so emails, blogging, RSS Feeds, all of that fun stuff has been put on hold for a couple of days. I thought I would take just a quick minute and share a couple of things that Oliver has said and/or done that have made me laugh this past week or so.

My brilliant brother-in-law, Ron, posted a video to Facebook of one of his buddies doing a rubber burning, smoke filled, loud and obnoxious burn-out. Oliver LOVED that video and made me show it to him quite a few times. The next day we were coming home from preschool and Oliver says, "Mom! Pull over and stop the van." I, of course, ask why and he says, "because I want you teach me how to drive." You're too young to drive is my response and he says something like, "I don't want to DRIVE the van I just want to do BURNOUTS! (lots of car noises)" We got home and I immediately hid the keys.

Night-night potty, teeth brushed, jammies on tucked into his bed, I kissed him goodnight around 8p.m. and told him I'd see him in the morning. Shortly after 9p.m. it was Noah's turn to be tucked in for the night. Usually, Oliver is sound asleep and no matter what strange noises Noah decides to make while climbing into bed, Ollie sleeps through it all. However, we walked in to find Oliver sitting up in bed, playing with his toy motorcycle and his covers completely messed up and torn off his bed. I asked him what happened, he looked at me as sad as possible and said in a very fake scratchy voice, "I have a cold, a really really bad cold. (little cough, little cough) It's soooo bad that when I coughed my covers did that. Yup, I coughed and they just sploded. I think I need some medicine so they don't do that again." Barely containing my laughter, I told him that I wasn't sure I could believe that story so he'd have to try sleeping again, without medicine. I also told him that I bet the motorcycle had more to do with the covers than his explosive coughs. In his scratchy voice again, "okay mom-mom I'll put down my motorcycle and try but if my covers get sploded by my cough again, you give me medicine, okay?"

Recently, I picked up a few more hours at work, I've been cashiering before doing my bookkeeping. It's not glamorous by any means but it is extra cash and that's always nice, especially in this economy! Anyway, I've been leaving the house around 2:30 in the afternoon and usually shower just before leaving. This means that Oliver gets to run about the house, all on his own, while I get ready for work. While in the shower, Oliver peaks around the shower curtain and in a very British sort of accent and very drawn out says, "Helllloooo there." I chuckled a little. Just as I'm about to say hello back, he throws back the shower curtain, whips out his spray bottle and sprays me 3 or 4 times while yelling, "and goodbye! hahahaha!" Before I could do or say anything else he had run out of the room. I laughed then immediately shut and locked the door.

This last little bit of Oliver's happened shortly after my shower too but on a different day. I was getting dressed and this is how the conversation went...

Oliver: Mom, what's that?
Me: A bra.
Oliver: Why? What does it do?
Me: (trying to keep it simple) There are a few reasons why girls wear bras but one is to cover them up.
Oliver: Well, I think girls should wear just shirts, no bras. That way they can just lift up their shirts and show me their boobies. That would be nice. (starts to walk away nodding his head yes) Really nice.
Me: (can't say a thing because I am part stunned and laughing hysterically)

Seriously though, where does he get this stuff? Of course, dad thinks he is a genius but I worry that the next 14 years are going to be long and very interesting with that child of ours. Let's hope that it's mostly full of laughter!